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Clear Thinking and Vision

October 29, 2017

Author: Bianca Yang
Email: ipacifics@gmail.com
Twitter: @xdrtxrdt

The master is one who has failed more than the amateur.

I frequently find myself diving too far into unimportant problems. I once spent half an hour talking with a friend about why a crossroads was the right way to describe a juncture in life. It was a fun conversation, and we landed on a sufficient answer, but I feel like the answer should have been obvious from the beginning. (We eventually came to the conclusion that the crossroads was really more like a fan, because you could walk anywhere on the 180 degree plane that extends away from your current direction. But that idea is too complicated for general use, so the crossroads is sufficient.)

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This flaw in my thinking has caused me significant stress because I end up wasting lots of time on simple problems. It is sometimes good to explore all the details of various problems, but it’s also important to see the big picture and think creatively about big problems.

At the same time, I find that I frequently overlook details. I lack discipline when doing proofreading or similar activities, so I frequently turn in or present work with obvious mistakes in it. But these problems are just part of my journey in this infinite game of life. I play out of choice, and I play for the sake of continuing the play of others. Only by giving completely, by absolutely relinquishing control and ownership, can I fully participate and be healed.

Life is made all the more meaningful by our struggles. For only by experiencing and truly understanding pain and sorrow can be appreciate happiness and love. I want to devote the rest of my life to achieving a meaningful project for mankind. I want to work on something majestic that will elevate our thinking. I do not aim to eliminate suffering or improve the human condition, because I believe that we can only be saved through faith, and faith alone. Altruism cannot save a man from evil, because if he outwardly displays good but his heart is corrupted with sin, he will still be sent to eternal punishment. Only by trusting in Jesus Christ and emulating Him and acting out God’s Word can we receive salvation. I want to work miracles by God’s power and help all of us grow closer to him.

I am still waiting, still disciplining my mind, that I can receive God’s word and understand how I can serve His purpose. My vision is limited, but God’s is infinite. I hope to be able to receive my mission and carry it out faithfully, that the world may be saved.


If you like my writings and want to chat with me, send me an email at ipacifics [at] gmail [dot] com. I’m open for job requests, critique on my writings, and other inquiries. My website is here: http://xrdt.github.io